Adobe InDesign CSVI Ships
SAN JOSE, CA — 12:01 AM 1 APR 2012 — FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE
[Editor’s note: This was our 2012 April Fool’s Post]
Adobe Systems, Inc. announces the immediate shipping release of Adobe InDesign CSVI, an important update to its page-layout application used by graphic designers in six of the seven continents. Adopting the recent naming convention of Acrobat X, Adobe has decided to rename all its applications using roman numerals in 2012. InDesign CSVI (which should be pronounced “svee” to differentiate it from the German word for “two”) contains no additional user features or user interface modifications, but has some significant improvements “under the bonnet,” as explained by Senior Product Manager Chris Kitchener.
“We decided to go deep instead of wide,” explained Kitchener. “We focused on three pillars of improvement in CSVI: automating many of our internal code-writing and testing systems; revisiting documentation enhancements; and improving the upgrade rate of our customers. While our customers won’t typically notice these underlying changes, we believe they will learn to appreciate our modifications and be drawn to The Cloud.”
Kiyo Toma, Senior Senior Product Manager for InDesign, elucidated, “It’s all about The Creative Cloud now. Not only can you run InDesign in The Cloud, but your Cloud documents are enhanced by the universal and ubiquitous nature of The Cloud. In fact, in our user tests, we find that most users are in A Cloud when even thinking about The Cloud. Plus, by increasing our Cloud-centric codification and documentizing methodologies, we have increasingly obfuscated our structural and communicative compartmentalizations.”
The changes are perhaps best described by Senior Senior Senior InDesign Architect Douglas Waterfall, who noted, “We’re looking forward, not backward. You can see that if you look at the code. Which you can’t, by the way.”
Longtime InDesign users, who are accustomed to getting new features in each release of the product, may be surprised that the user interface looks the same. However, Junior Senior Senior Junior Marketing Chieftess for InDesign Annemarie Beliard weighed in, “We’re convinced that our customers will learn to appreciate the newness of this version. Plus, we did make one major change: the icon color is now CS-VIolet. Also, did I mention The Cloud?”
Adobe InDesign CSVI has already been distributed to all current InDesign users’ computers, via new Adobe Creative Cloud Technology that knows when you are sleeping and knows when you’re awake, and fees will be automatically withdrawn from user bank accounts. Customers who had carefully read their End User License Agreement (EULA) are aware that the deadline for the Opt-Out period ended March 31.
To install InDesign CSVI, simply launch your current copy of InDesign. Note that due to current limitations in The Cloud, Adobe cannot modify the splash screen or version number on your device. So while it will appear the same, customers are advised to believe that they are, in fact, using InDesign CSVI.
Related News:
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- News: InDesign Drops Support for Print Publishing
- Adobe Recants: Flash and Interactive Apps Cancelled
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Ha ha!!
Oh my god, that’s true ! CSVI is much much better ! I wish more people were working on this sunday to discover that.
I believed it … right up to the part where it was said that existing bugs were being squashed!
Almost got me. Up until the line about most users being in a cloud.
Good one!
What could happen to InDesign documents if the Cloud turns into rain, will they keep dry or get wet?
CSVI: Best Adobe upgrade ever. Installation was seamless?I didn’t even have to quit any other applications! No restart needed.
Best of all, CSVI is not running any slower than CS5.5. No need to upgrade my hardware this time around. And I’ve now been using it for almost a full day without any notices of critical security updates pending.
The Cloud confuses me, though. Is Adobe AIR above or below The Cloud. Does Flash turn it into a thundercloud?
I think you are wrong about the splash screen, though. I just checked, and although the program still is named CS5.5, the version number is 7.5. How could that be right?
Ray, the Cloud issue regarding Flash was on the general Adobe info pack. It declares that if you have three or more Creative Suite programs open, and one of them is Flash, then you are operating in a ThunderStorm, not just the Cloud. It advises staying away from Windows.
Funny. As I read on and on, I kept computing the cost of an upgrade versus staying with CS5 and had pretty much decided to stay with 5 (I mean, V).
I ‘m waiting for CSVI.V
This is fantastic news. I want Roaming numerals for all my Creative Suite applications, so I don’t have to worry about them staying home when I’m travelling.
Can’t wait to have Adobe AIR connecting me to the Cloud on my brand new Thunderbolt screen. I’m gonna rename my setup “Greased Lightning” once CSVI thunders forth. ;-)
I knew it was April Fool’s day yesterday, I had read about the jokes others had played and had played on them, and you still sucked me in! What does it say about Adobe and my opinion of them that up until about the 4th paragraph I was believing that someone from there could actually say that babble? And expect us users to suck it up?
It’s sad that Adobe developers going “deep instead of wide” in only an April joke